The Couple in the Competition
by Cassie Bones
Summary: Booth and Brennan, as a couple, are obviously very competitive. Let's just see how much in this series of one-shots, hmm?
1. PieEating

**New One-shot series! These revolve around Booth and Brennan face against each other in varying competition. Pre-pregnancy, during, and after, when they have a child. (The child with be a different gender for each consecutive chapter; boy,girl,boy,girl,etc.) Enjoy!**

Pie-Eating

"Come on, Dad! Come on, Bones!" Parker called to his father and his father's partner as he raced around the carnival grounds, from game to game, while the couple followed at a leisurely pace, just enjoying one another's company.

Booth smiled at his little boy, who was growing up so fast, and then at his partner's growing tummy, now five-months pregnant, his eyes raking up, over her full breasts, to her face, where she was engorging herself on a large stick of cotton candy.

Booth chuckled at the childlike wonder in her eyes as she ingested the sugary treat. Brennan turned to him with wide blue eyes. "What?" she asked.

"You hungry there, Bones?" Booth asked, chuckling.

Brennan smiled, sheepishly. "Perhaps a little, but its _your_ fault."

"What did I do?" Booth asked, innocently.

Brennan stopped walking and stared at him, looking pointedly down to her swollen tummy. Booth blushed. "Oh, right...that."

Brennan smirked and continued walking, following Parker to where he stopped at the stand to sign up for a pie-eating contest. He was pouting.

"What's wrong, Parker?" Brennan asked.

Parker looked up at her, his pout firmly in place. "I wanted to enter, but we missed the junior competition. The next one is for people eighteen and older."

"Aw, maybe next time, Buddy." Booth said, scuffling up his hair.

"But, Da-ad! The winner get's a five-hundred dollar gift certificate. Do you know how many video games I could get with that?" Parker protested.

"I know, Buddy, but you know the rules. You have to be-"

"I'll do it." Brennan said, suddenly.

"What?" Booth asked at the same time Parker exclaimed. "Really?"

"Bones, you'd do that for me?" Parker asked, his big brown eyes sparkling at her.

Brennan smiled. "Of course. Just so long as you split the money with me and don't spend it all on video games and candy, I don't see why not."

"Yes!" Parker said, pumping his fist in the air, as his blonde curls bounced. "Thanks, Bones!" He said, throwing his arms around her waist, careful not to bump his little sibling too hard, like his father taught him.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Bones, you sure about this? I mean, you just had a whole thing of cotton candy, for God's sake. You don't even _like_ pie!"

"So? This is your child Booth. I'm more than certain as soon as I start eating pie, I won't stop until we're both satisfied. Why? You don't think I can do this?"

"It's not that! It's just...I wanted to do the pie-eating contest. I mean, I like pie way better than you and I really haven't had that much today."

"Not to mention that you're stomach is like a bottomless pit. Metaphorically speaking."

"Actually, that's a simile." Parker interrupted, smartly.

Brennan smirked at him and pushed his head playfully, before turning back to Booth. "Even still, I'm eating for two, so I've quite certain that I could finish before you do."

"Oh, really? Then how about we put this to a little test, Bones?" Booth challenged. "Winner splits the gift certificate with Parker and loser...does the dishes for a week."

Brennan smirked. "Deal. Just make sure you get all the grime off this time. And NOT...with your teeth." Booth guffawed and followed Brennan to the sign-up table, where they entered the competition.

Half an hour later, Booth and Brennan were seated side by side at a long table, with pies piled in front of them. There were only two other contestants. A skinny, lanky, college-aged kid, and a large, robust man, who looked remarkably like Santa.

The announcer read them the rules as follows;

No touching other contestants at all.

Entire pie must be gone before next one can be placed in front of contestant.

Only word that can be uttered is, 'Next' for the next pie.

Breaking any of the above rules is means for instant disqualification.

"Ready...set...GO!" At the sound of a siren, both Booth and Brennan launched their faces into the pies set in front of them, both eating with lightning speed as their assistants helped them go from pie to pie and Parker looked on in astonishment.

They were going much faster than the old fat man or the scrawny college kid, beating them each by two or three pies.

Brennan was upping Booth by half a pie and Booth noticed, trying as hard as he could to catch up, not missing the smirk Brennan sent his way as she asked for the next pie.

Booth growled and ate as quickly as he could, taking much bigger bites and only barely chewing them before swallowing.

Soon they were tied, both not even sparing the other a glance or their contestants as the college kid passed out in a food coma and the old man grew green with over-engorgement and ran from the table to empty the contents in his stomach.

At one point Booth got a piece of cherry stuck in his nose and had to stop three seconds to get it out, which seemed to be enough for Brennan to get to her next, and last pie. Booth struggled to get caught up, but it was no use.

Within a few seconds, Brennan was named victor and she stood up, proudly raising her arms in victory and bowing as much as her swollen tummy would allow.

The announcer came over to congratulate her and placed a large blue ribbon over her left shoulder, before tapping her on the back. Suddenly, Brennan's face changed and she clasped her hand over her mouth, causing the announcer to turn and run as fast as he could in the opposite direction as Brennan's cheeks puffed out and...

She let out a long, loud belch that would have made just about any hillbilly and redneck proud and had her partner and technical 'stepson' smiling in earnest at her.

When the belch ended, Brennan placed her hand delicately over her mouth, a blush rising on her cheeks, and shyly said, "Excuse me!" while Booth stood up and placed his arm around her.

"That's my girl!" he announced to just about everybody who could hear him. Brennan scowled at him but he was giving her such a devoted and adoring look that her scowl eventually turned into a soft smile, as she kissed his cheek, letting out another small burp.

The announcer, who'd been keeping a safe distance, tentatively came up to the couple and handed Brennan the gift certificate she'd won.

Brennan thanked him and took a look at it, groaning.

"What's wrong?" Booth asked. Brennan showed him the gift certificate and he burst out laughing.

It was for a Place called 'Ma's Pie Factory' which boasted having the best pie on all of the East Coast.

**Hope you enjoyed that!**


	2. Carnival Game

_**New oneshot! ENJOY!**_

_Carnival Games_

"_Ooh! Daddy, I want that one!" Cristina Lynne Booth exclaimed, pointing to yet another prize at a game booth at the annual DC Fall Carnival._

_Booth, who was already lugging around an armful of stuffed lizards and blow up aliens, peered around the small pile in his hands and groaned at the next prize she wanted; a stuffed Skeleton with a pink bow on its cranium._

_Of course my kid wants a skeleton toy._ Booth thought. _She's just like her mother._

"Crissy," Parker said, from beneath his own pile of stuffed animals. "Don't you think you have enough prizes."

Parker was about fifteen now and though he loved having little siblings, the appeal was starting to dissipate.

Crissy looked at him blankly. "Why would I think that when I clearly think I need more?"

Booth chuckled. _Just like Bones._

Brennan stood nearby, holding the newest addition to their little family; a son named Matthew Joseph Booth. She was talking to Angela, who was holding her own baby girl, Monet. Monet was about a year old now and was being more difficult than she should have been. Hodgins was off with Michael, riding all the kiddy rides in the park over and over.

When Brennan heard Crissy asking for more toys from her father, she smirked and looked over, already predicting what would happen.

Booth tried to reason with her. "Baby, if we get you any more stuffed animals, you're not even going to fit in your bedroom. So where are you going to sleep?"

Crissy shrugged. "We can just put them in Parker's room. I'm sure he won't mind."

Parker's eyes widened. "What? Uh-uh, no way are you putting any of these in my room! You're not even allowed to _look_ in my room! It's not gonna happen, Cris."

Crissy pouted, looking even more like Brennan with her crystal blue eyes sparkling and her soft auburn curls. Booth wanted to let out a very unmanly squeal whenever she gave him this face, but relented. "Fine." he grumbled. "But you have to give some of the lizards to Michael. I'm sure him and his father would love to dissect them or something."

Crissy smiled, triumphantly. "Okay! Thanks, Daddy!" she said, turning to the man at the booth. "He's gonna play." she pointed to her father, who smiled awkwardly at the man before dropping all the stuffed animals and aliens and stepping up, while Brennan, Angela, and Parker looked on, amused.

"So…what do we do here?" Booth asked.

The man smiled. "It's a pretty easy game. I'll give you three suction darts and you have to get at least _one_ of them on a star." He pointed to a poster full of small red stars, then showed Booth one of the suctions, almost the same size as one of the stars.

Booth grinned. "Well, that seems easy enough." Booth said, paying the $2.00 for the game and taking the darts offered to him.

"Oh, and the whole dart has to be on red for you to win." The man added as Booth threw the first dart, missing the prize by just a centimeter.

Booth glared at him. "Now, how the heck am I supposed to do that when these things are obviously smaller than the stars?" he growled.

The man grinned, and wordlessly took a dart and placed it right over a star. Stepping away, he showed that the suction was completely surrounded by red. "It's easy." he said, grinning cockily.

Booth narrowed his eyes at him, before turning back to the poster and going into sniper mode. He focused himself on the poster, brought his hand next to his chin, aimed, and threw.

And missed.

Booth groaned, looking down at his last dart, then at the little girl looking hopefully up at him.

He repeated his actions from before, this time willing himself to relax, and threw it straight towards a star, but one tiny part of his dart was off the star. "Goddammit!" he exclaimed. "Give me three more." he ordered, throwing two more dollars at the man, who smiled and dished out three more darts.

Booth threw all three as strategically as he learned while in the Rangers. He missed three more times.

He paid two more dollars and missed. Two more dollars and three more misses. Finally, he just lay his head down on the counter, while Crissy begged him to try again.

Then he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up and saw his Bones standing there, holding their son. He stood straight up and gave a confused grunt as Brennan placed Matthew in his arms. "Hold him." she ordered, before stepping up to the booth herself, and taking out her own two dollars.

She handed them to the man wordlessly and Booth watched, amazed, as she threw all three and all three landed right in the middle of three different stars, all surrounded by red. The man blinked at her, stunned.

Brennan just smiled as her daughter high-fived her. "I'll take the skeleton, that blue puppy, and…Angela, what do you think Monet will like better; the purple elephant or the pink unicorn with the multicolor horn?

Angela grinned. "Unicorn, definitely."

"The unicorn, please." Brennan said.

The man just stared for a moment, before he grabbed the three prizes and handed them over. Brennan thanked them and deposited to toys among the small children. Crissy got the skeleton she wanted, Matthew got a puppy, which he immediately cuddled into and fell asleep, and Monet stopped fussing when the unicorn was in her arms, smiling happily as she made neighing sounds.

"Hey!" Parker whined. "Where's my prize?" he pouted, looking very much like Booth, especially with the way his hair was cut and darkened now.

Brennan chuckled. "I might as well play again and get you and Michael something. And maybe something for your father, since he looks like he's about to cry."

"I do not!" Booth argued, whining.

Brennan laughed as he pouted at her and paid an extra two dollars for another game, winning Booth a large, stuffed gorilla and Parker a monkey that could hang around his chest, and for Michael she won the purple elephant.

Much to the man's displeasure behind the booth.

**REVIEW!**


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